Keeping Perspective When Grief Shows Up for the Holidays

Grief is difficult enough on its own terms. However, against the backdrop of jingle bells and Norman Rockwell images of holiday cheer, the natural process of mourning a loss can be excruciating.

Whether it’s the death of a loved one, divorce, or the loss of a job, we all have to deal with grief at some point. And though it may be difficult for you to see grief as a gift through a physical lens, people from different faiths find new opportunities for spiritual growth and healing when they suffer losses.

Whatever your beliefs or background, it is important to remember that grief takes us a through a healing process. After all, your life has been permanently changed when you suffer a loss, and it requires healing to get past the event and move on. While grief is painful, there are many things to learn from grief. Challenging times provide the possibility of growth. Grief gives you an opportunity to reevaluate your life and refocus. Turn to your friends and family members. Seek professional help. In the meantime, here are some ideas to help you keep perspective as the holiday crush is fast upon us.

Grief can ....

Create gratitude. You might not think you have anything to be grateful for, but grief happens when things are taken away from us. Grief can help you to appreciate what you had, as well as what you still have. It’s easy to take things for granted. Grief is a tough way to learn to be more grateful, but the opportunity is there.

Help you engage with your life. It’s very easy to float along without really committing to anything. Tragedy can be a wake-up call and remind you that your time is limited. There are only so many days left. Ensure that you’re making the most of each day.

Can help you to refocus. Perhaps you spend too much time focused on work at the expense of your family life. Use grief as a time of reflection. Are you spending your time in the best manner for you? Have you ever thought about it?

Show you who your friends really are. It’s uncomfortable to be around others in pain or who are not at the top of their game. But your true friends will still be there for you. The others will find an excuse to stay away.

Teach you life really does go on. After a tragedy, life continues and 99.999 percent of the people on the planet are unaffected. Everything keeps moving forward. Your life must continue, too. It doesn’t seem fair that the world doesn’t take a timeout for your grief. But there’s always someone grieving somewhere. That’s why it is important for you to give yourself space.

Strengthen you as an overcomer. Your life will eventually recover from your loss. It’s surprising how good things can be after enough time has passed. You can then approach the future with the knowledge that you can handle anything life has in store. You’ll be stronger than you’ve ever been.

Resolve bitterness. Some of us tend to be bitter regardless of the occasion. Grief highlights the fact that bitterness isn’t a viable strategy for dealing with life. Grief can facilitate a less bitter view of life.

Help you let go of the small stuff. After dealing with great heartache, it’s not easy to be petty. The small things become even smaller. The important things become more important. Grief can be a blessing in this regard. Your life has the potential to become richer in the future.

It's tempting to avoid your grief by staying busy. The holidays bring pressure, but the frenzy also provides many hiding places. Just remember, you can’t stuff your grief into an overhead compartment without something falling on your head sooner or later. You’ll find that your grief will be waiting for you and your sadness will get your full attention eventually. Surround yourself with loving, supportive people who will be there for you during the holidays and in healing times ahead.

#selfempowerment #holidays #selfcare